Obesity is Contagious

This is a day I have dread all my life. Obesity is contagious......just what all of us fatties need. I can't tell you how many times I am out in a bar with friends and several bar stools next to me remain empty. I always try to put myself in one of the center stools so that does not happen. I think to myself, "Geez, do these people think being fat is contagious or something?" Apparently they were right. All these years that thought has crossed my mind and now it may be a reality. How much more bias and prejudice do us fat folks have to withstand? We are already left out, easily dismissed or met with looks of disgust by many in society. WTF were scientists and the media trying to do? I just want to crawl in a hole and die even more so now.

On the Today Show the day this was announced Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford discussed this. I was so upset with Kathie Lee as she puffed out her cheeks and stretched her arms out like she was a fat person. I found this disturbing and hurtful. Clearly Kathie Lee has a bias against fat people. Then she had the balls to say that they were just making fun of it. Bitch, (Kathie Lee) there is nothing funny about your words or actions poking fun at fat people. We are humans, we have souls and we have feelings. You cannot even begin to know the mean and rude things that we encounter every single day. Not occasionally but many times a day people snicker, point or say things to the people around them. It hurts more than any of them can imagine. Don't they realize we are already well aware of how we look and that we face discrimination every minute of every day. We beat ourselves up enough without having society treat us as outcasts and freaks or to have some celebrity with no filter on what she says to make fun of us on national TV.

There are many people in this world that won't even get to know a fat person because they find us unattractive. My doctor said to me, "I wish you could see what those of us that know you see." Therein lies the problem, some people could care less what kind of person I am solely on my appearance. They make no effort and have no desire to know me just because I am fat. And this report will only make it worse for fat folks. People that I know will even pretend to not know me in public when they are with a group of their family and friends. This just happened to me a week ago. A young girl, Shannon, that I have known for years was out at the bar where she is a bartender with her family and friends. For the 2 hours I was in the bar she would not acknowledge me or look in my direction just in case she would have to say hi and the people she was with would know that she knew me. This has been a frequent occurence my entire life. It hurts, I cannot say that it doesn't.

People that are not fat do not know the things we endure and have to put up with. I can't take it anymore. I don't go out in public unless I absolutely have to. I am angry and bitter at how society treats fat folks. Remember Tyra Banks and her fat suit episode? I was angry that she did this. Sure she got a very small taste of what we feel every minute but at the end of the day she was back to being Tyra, a top model. It did not dig at her heart and soul every minute of every day like it does for us fat folks. We can't take off a fat suit. We can't pretend we are horrified at how fat people are treated. We can't pretend because for us it is life. A lonely, sad and relentless reality.

This announcement in the media about obesity being contagious is just going to make society turn their backs on us even more. This was a very sad day in the already sad lives of obese people. Society will avoid us even more. We will be even more invisible to store clerks, and others that must wait on us. It will be harder to get jobs. No one will want to stand next to us just in case we sneeze on them. Obesity truly is the last acceptable prejudice and now science has made sure it stays prevalent.

You have such a pretty face.

How many times have we heard that one. Like they say, "If I had a nickel for every time I have heard that." In our case maybe it should be, "If I could lose a pound every time I hear that." I remember feeling ostracized at a very young age. My cousin was getting married and my little sister was to be the flower girl. She was refusing to walk down the aisle so I turned to my Mom and said, "I'll do it." My Mom looked at me and said, "They don't want you." Four simple little words that radiated in a five year old's mind. To me, they did not want me because I was fat. That may not have been the reason. I don't know. As most fat little girls we were teased by the other kids. Sometimes even by adults. My first grade gym teacher made remarks about me being fat in front of the whole class. We were doing gymnastics and it was my turn to do a 'log roll.' In front of the whole gym class she remarked, "Come on, Karen. You should be really good at this because you are so round and fat." I was so humiliated. I wanted to cry but in my young mind that would just make it worse. She failed me. People talk about low self-esteem and how people should pull themselves up by their bootstraps, stand tall, be proud. I have tried. I know I am a wonderful, caring, giving, compassionate and so on person. I love those things about myself. I work hard to be a good person. Society does not see these good qualities in me. They can not see past my fat. I think most fat people have to work much harder that a normal or average person to be appreciated. We do not have the same chances and opportunities available to us. All around us society lets us know we are ugly, gross, disgusting, etc. So when this is all you hear about your appearance how the hell are we supposed to pull ourselves up by the boot strap and love ourselves. There is a commercial on TV right now for a weight loss pill. It shows pockets of body fat on an animated body while the announcer says 'fat is disgusting.' Those are not the exact words but close to what is implied. Next time I hear the commercial I will get the exact wording in here. Yet I am supposed to love myself even though I am told I am unappealing to all. When I was around 25 I had knee surgery and developed deep vein thrombosis (blood clots) in my right calf. I was waiting for a venogram and was holding my chart. At the time I was a nursing student so I decided I would read my chart. I went to a page with a report from the internist that was treating me. The very first sentence described me as "a grotesquely obese 25 y/o." I was horrified. Imagine what that would do to your self-esteem. My heart sunk. Fat people are human. We have souls. We have feelings. We are even more sensitive in my opinion because we are the butt of jokes, stares, rude comments, bias and prejudice. I hate being fat. I hate living some days. I wish I could barter with God so I could be average, so I could have the same doors open for me that others have available to the. I am tired of people telling me that this is only my imagination. I know what I have encountered in my life time as the girl with 'such a pretty face, if she just wasn't so fat."